When my middle son, who is now a healthy seven year old that lights up my days, was born three weeks early, I worried for my tiny heart that was now outside of my body.  Carter had trouble breathing and as I looked down into his scrunched up face and listened to him struggle for each breath, I knew something was wrong. 

    My hospital room quickly filled with nurses and doctors.  Soon Carter was whisked away to the NICU and put on a ventilator.  I wouldn’t be able to hold my new baby for three days because of the stress that it put on his body.  I stayed in his intensive care room for the next six days, only leaving his side to go home briefly to tend to my two year old at home with Daddy. 

    My heart would break again each day when more tubes were added and more lines protruded from his little five-pound body.  The nurses would quietly pat my hand and not judge the mother who silently wept when his blood had to be taken for more tests.  I couldn’t protect my baby from the pain of the tests that were supposed to be helping him.  I prayed that I could have his pain – that I could take away all of the hurt.

    Day by day, Carter got stronger and I was able to take him home.  During those days that I stayed in his room, I would see the other parents that sat diligently by their own children’s beds.  I knew the look of hurt and fear in their eyes. 

    I want to do a little to help pay back an organization that helps families of sick children by providing a place for them to stay while their child is in the hospital.  The Ronald McDonald House provides a safe environment that is a little bit of normalcy for families with sick children.

    So in honor of my birthday, which is on Valentine's Day, I want to give back to the families and sick children of The Ronald McDonald House.  So from now through Valentine's Day, I'll donate ALL of my proceeds from the sales of Worlds Apart to The Ronald McDonald House.  They make a difference in so many families' lives --let's see if we can help! 

    From our hearts to theirs, share the love. 

            It has been almost seven weeks to the day since I found out that I had a mass on my right frontal lobe.  I’ve since found out that it’s ‘not a tumor’ (said in my best Kindergarten cop voice) and that the spot was actually caused by a stroke.  I’ve filled my frequent flyer card visiting all of the doctors in the area.  I have a small hole in my heart, but the jury is still out on if surgery is the best option.

            After I got sick, I started to evaluate my life and found that I was taking for granted that I would always have tomorrow.  I’ll go out for lunch tomorrow with my friends because I need to clean the house today.  I will write that note to my friend tomorrow because I need to grocery shop today.  Tomorrow may never come.  I don’t mean to be morbid, but I need to start doing these things today! 

            My literary agent is located in the UK, and right in the middle of my sickness my husband said, “Why don’t you go over and meet with him in person and take your mom?”  Josh travels a lot and has saved up all of his airline and hotel points.  He booked our tickets the next day.  Yes, I know how lucky I am to be married to my best friend that always knows just what I need.  “A trip with your mom will be good for both of you.”

            My mom is a spunky woman with pure white hair and energetic as all get out.  She can run circles around people half her age.  She has a wicked sense of humor and she is my best medicine on most days.  Mom tells me that she is going to pack in a carry on suitcase because she will not pay the $25 for her luggage.  She tells me that she is going to bring two sweaters and just wear them a couple of times.  “You realize we are going to be gone for seven days right, Mom?  That is more than a couple of times.”

            The next few days made memories for me that I’ll never forget.  I doped us both up on Tylenol PM because it was an overnight flight.  We could hardly peel our eyes open to get off the plane.  We took a double decker bus around the city of London to see the sights.  Mom slept off and on for two hours only to wake up and mumble, “Uh huh.”  She later asked me if they are even speaking English because she couldn’t understand a word they are saying.

            We meet lots of interesting people and a few couples from London as we are having high tea.  Mom speaks in a loud voice and slows her speech down when speaking to them as if they are deaf.

            Traveling by bus to the Tower of London, Mom tells an Italian couple about my book.  They don’t speak English very well and so she starts saying, “Libro, libro!” “That’s Spanish, Mom.  They are Italian and not deaf.”  As I drag her off the bus she is talking about how we will see the Crown Jewels.  “Wait till you see the King’s shaft, I mean his shank.  It is filled with his family jewels.”  I just bet it is, Mom!

            We had promised my husband that we would try Fish N Chips while there.  We ordered a plate and when my mom looked down at it, she made a face.  “This doesn’t look like it does at Long John Silver’s!”  My mom has no volume control.  Check, please!  We had a lovely dinner at McDonald’s that night.

            Our last day, we headed over to see the Westminster Abbey.  It was closed to sightseeing by the time we got there.  We could get in to see it if we attended the church service starting in a few minutes.  I turned to Mom and asked, “I wonder what religion it is?”  She causally replied, “Who cares?  It’s free!”  The inside of the Abbey is beautiful and I did enjoy it even though I froze for an hour listening to the choir sing songs that “didn’t even sound like they were in English.”

            Our week was coming to an end.  We got to the airport five hours early just in case.  As we pushed our way back to the 40th row of the airplane and plopped down in what would be our seat for the next nine hours, I smiled over at my mom.  The gentleman in the next row over was explaining the US Customs form to his neighbor.  Yelling in a loud voice (he must have gone to the same school as my mom), “Sir, have you come in contact with livestock?”  Blank stare.  “This means have you physically touched a cow, a goat, or a pig?”  Over the course of the next two hours, this older gentleman got up and changed seats with the guy in front of him exactly nine times because he didn’t want to sit next to his wife.  He roamed the aisles looking for free seats and started asking random people for their seats.   

            Mom needed to go to the bathroom and said, “I’ll go first and you stay here.  I don’t want him to take my seat!”  As I waited for what seemed like forever with my leg thrown over her seat, she finally returned. 

            “I met a really nice couple from Chicago and told them about your book.  I told them about the sex scenes!” Awkward?  Not at all when I’m with my mom!

            I will never forget this week and plan to make all of my tomorrows count as much as my todays.  I wish for everyone to laugh and laugh much.  Laugh until you are struggling to breathe and your cheeks hurt from smiling.  Celebrate LIFE, walk humbly, love fiercely, and live joyfully. 

           

           

           “You have a mass on your right frontal lobe.  We aren’t sure what caused it yet or determined what it is.  We will need to run more tests to find out more.”

            I wish that this was a scene from my book that I am writing but these are the words that changed my life just three short weeks ago.  That afternoon was a typical day in my life.  My husband was out of town on business, and I went to get the results of my MRI having had a daily headache for over a month.

            I drove home silently sobbing to myself as I reflected on my life and what these results could mean.  I mindlessly pushed through helping with the children’s homework, made dinner, gave baths, and fell asleep that night with my daughter nestled in my arms.

            After a second MRI with contrast they determined that the mass was caused by a small stroke and wasn’t a tumor.  This was great news (the no tumor part) but I had highly elevated inflammation in my blood vessels.  Over the next few weeks I had multiple blood tests run and had visits with a cardiologist, neurologist, and rheumatologist.

            At first my reaction was to joke about the mass because clearly it was responsible for some of my Words with Friends losses.  I posted the silly things my kids said or did on Facebook.  But as the pain in my head began to get worse and I could no longer get out of bed to take care of my children or anything else, I started to slip into a darkness I have never experienced before.

            Some days the pain in my head was so blinding that it gave me double vision, made me sick and dizzy.  My hands started to shake and had periods of numbness.  Since one of my passions in life is to write and I was no longer able to do so, I quickly switched to feelings of anger and frustration.  I dropped completely off of Facebook because suddenly there were more important things I needed to focus on—like getting better for my children.

            I wasn’t getting enough oxygen to my brain so I was having trouble finding the words that I wanted to say and would forget what I was saying in the middle of my sentence. 

I am still working on getting healthy.  It’s a daily struggle but I will not give up until I do.

            Life is full of moments--moments of joy, love, laughter, pain, despair, desperation, and frustration.  I have been partners with each of these moments in the last few weeks.  With Thanksgiving next week I wanted to take time to let you know how that one moment in the doctor’s office changed my life and will continue to change all of my upcoming moments.

            I will never be too busy cleaning the house to play with my children.  I will always take time to tell people what they mean to me.  I will continue to feel blessed with my family and friends who have held my hand through all of this even though we may be miles apart.  I will be grateful for each day that I open my eyes and be surrounded by the people I love the most.  I will cherish ALL of life’s moments.  May your moments be blessed—blessed with whatever pleases you the most.

Fellow author Elizabeth has a new book, Child of the Loch to be released on November 30th.  In just a few weeks, this book could be yours.  Check out the blurb and give Elizabeth some love on her release day!
 
Twenty-three year accountant, J.J McDonnell, has spent her life trying to be normal and hide her gifts, but all dreams of normalcy are dashed on her twenty-fourth birthday. A handsome man shows up on her porch with a marriage edict and news that the grandfather she has never met, has died. Her world is about to change forever. J.J must make the perilous journey to the Loch and take her place on its throne. With no idea what is expected of her and dark forces closing in at every turn, will J.J. be able to accept her destiny or will she stopped before she can?


 Meet Elizabeth Delana Rosa!

I have always been a writer. When I first learned to write in Kindergarten, I wrote about pigs who "groo" wings and became "butterfys." I knew way back then that I would have a love affair with writing. It over took my life and has been a constant companion. Now over 20 years later, that love flows over into writing blogs, reviews, poetry and fantasy novels.  You can find me on the web at www.crimsonflowerreview.com and www.elizabethdrosa.com

OPERATION: Uniting Service Men and Women Families WORLDS APART has begun!!

When I first started writing Worlds Apart, I was writing for myself as much as any one else. Since Worlds Apart has come out, I have been blessed by its success. It's now time to give back or pay my success forward by helping others that are away from their loved ones by protecting our freedom.

So starting today and going thru November 15th, proceeds made on the sales of my book, WORLDS APART, will be used to pay down a service person's layaway at Wal-Mart just in time for the holidays.

How can you get involved? We need your help!
1. If you are a service person and/or spouse or know of someone whom is, who could use a little help paying down layaway items, PM me the name and it will go into a drawing for several recipients.

2. Go out and buy the book and then tell your neighbors, friends, heck your neighbor's friends and pass the word! It is ALL sales on any sites--Barnes and Noble, Amazon, Xlibris, and iTunes. Thank you for your support! ♥